Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Planet Manola: Of Madames and Spinsters

Random news, commentary and photographs. Updated at least once every menstrual cycle, if not more frequently.

photo by shveckle Have you ever been out on a date and felt exactly like this? Photo by Shveckle.


A forum member at Talk Night Life posted a link to my Raleigh Runway Caper piece and inspired a little discussion, mainly about tourism. One member, however, expressed his opinion about Sex and the Beach:
that blog is pretty lame.

ohhhhh south beach, i love you i hate you i love you i hate you i blah blah blah
I realize this opinion was meant as negative criticism, but that second line is brilliant! Actually it made me laugh my ass off and I hope it gives my regular readers at least a good chuckle. Enjoy.


Just when you thought Lincoln Road's Chabad bus synagogue-on-wheels was quaint, another bus comes along that gives whole new meaning to local culture, and by culture I don't mean the seat stains on the 25 cent South Beach local!

Nope, if you've seen that big-ass limo bus tooling around town, you've spotted a movable feast that would put Hemingway's debauchery to shame. According to The Herald, we now know for whom the bus blows:

Undercover Miami Beach detectives Sunday busted a brothel-on-wheels, which charged $40 admission and offered sex for sale inside.

On board: prostitutes, fully stocked bars and the bus' madame -- Christine Morteh, 29, of Miramar.

Cops have charged Morteh with engaging in, directing others to and deriving support from prostitution, as well as operating a business without license.

Oh for pete's sake! What took so long for this cult of fellatio bus to arouse erections instead of suspicion?

In an unconfirmed report, one male tourist arrested for soliciting prostitution on the bus claimed he was confused by false advertising. "Me no speak English. Me thought it was Duck Tour! D-U-C-K. Duck like quack quack, yes?" [via 411]


In the movie Baby Mama, Kate (Tina Fey) has this interesting exchange with her mother, Rose (Holland Taylor). Rose doesn't understand why her daughter wants to be a single mom.

Rose: "Now, we have all adjusted to your alternative lifestyle."
Kate: "Mother, being single is not an alternative lifestyle."
Rose: "It is when you are 37 years old."

Ugh. Whenever I tell people I'm single, most react incredulously. "How's that possible? Why have you never been married?" And I quickly reply: "Because I avoided two divorces." That usually shuts them up.

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class factotum said...

Before I met my fiance', I would get insulted at that question -- "Why have you never married?"

Then I realized what the real sentiment was behind the question: "How is it that someone as wonderful as you has remained single? Obviously, it's because you have chosen not to marry, because any man would be a fool not to want you."

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