Friday, October 18, 2013
Post Not Partum Depression
I never in my wildest dreams figured I’d be a single mom at age 45. My children are in their eighties. They weigh about 150 pounds each. They poop, pee and need to eat soft foods because of teeth issues. Sometimes, they should be using diapers, although that’s considered an indignity. We go to different doctors for check ups every week and deal with visits from phlebotomists. Instead of writing more blog posts, I’ve become a medical historian and have also “recorded” stool samples.
So yeah, now I’ve got two households, with endless medical, household and financial issues involved; yet no insurance company considers my “children” frail enough for therapy and God forbid the caregiver should get any respite.
I’m so busy taking care of my two “kids,” that I don’t have time or energy to figure it all out and in the meantime, I’ve lost important clients and networking opportunities. I barely have enough energy to write, although I do get some support from siblings, which I appreciate.
Of course, it’s an honor to take care of my parents, not only because they gave me life, but also because they took care of me. I love them with all my heart and I wouldn’t change a darn thing.
But dear Lord, this country needs to wake up on making elder care a little easier for caregivers, especially when your charge are two eighty-year old folks with Alzheimer’s.
I know we'll be OK. But my heart breaks a little every day to see these two beautiful people fall apart, no matter how much care I give them and how many sacrifices I make.
Related: an article about caregiving on NPR.