Monday, June 07, 2010

BREAKING NEWS! Looming Penis Threatening Miami Women!

establishedmen.com penis ad miami living magazineSexy Miami bitches beware! Attack of the Big Penis coming soon to a luxury condo near you.

I know this news is so last week, but I how could I resist? I used to write for Miami Living, a luxury style magazine, and I'm so glad that they continue to epitomize all that is classy and sophisticated about the Magic City. Just take a look at the ad (shown above) that they approved for Miami's #1 dating site gold digger meets sugar daddy service Establishedmen.com!

Apparently, the editor-in-chief did not notice the ad before sending the issue to print. There's even some question about whether the editor-in-chief lives in Miami, which is duh! so obvious something is not quite 305 right. What true Miamian would miss this oh-so-subliminal message of two greedy ho-bags about to suck on a looming schlong? Come on!

See Miami Living Magazine? SEE WHAT YOU'VE BEEN MISSING? Obviously you haven't seen peen in a long time!

By the way, I want to know which stupid-ass rich mother fucker is so desperate he's willing to fork out money for a pretty pussy. Because you know, I have plenty of girlfriends who could certainly use "successful and generous benefactors to fulfill their lifestyle needs."

Oh wait, that would never work ... none of my girlfriends would suck cock for a wad of cash.

More at Miami New Times and Huffington Post. For more fabulous cock shadow fun, visit The Cockshadow Blog, "the number one site on the internet for all your cock shadow needs."

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