Friday, April 27, 2007

Planet Manola: Strap On!

Random news, commentary and photographs. Updated at least once every menstrual cycle, if not more frequently.

strap on apply directly to the hoochie Don't laugh! Absolutely adorable Anna from across the pond knows that sex toys aren't always the key to happiness!


SPERMALICIOUS

It's official! Sex and the Beach has crossed over into six digits, receiving 100,000 page loads this afternoon! Eh, seriously, who cares? What's 100K when some jackass jerking off at internet porn produces up to 500 million sperm?

So in honor of this momentous non-ejaculatory event, I'd like to ponder the following questions:

1. Would Rainman count each and every sperm?

2. What if fertility clinics had Technorati rankings? "Over 71 million sperm, some of them have to be good."

3. Can "sorry, I'm allergic to your sperm" be a good break-up line?

4. We know sperm is vegan but is a strap-on kosher?

5. Will insurance companies cover repetitive stain injuries on a fluffer?

STRAPPING FELLAS

Speaking of fluff, huff and puff, there's a new kid in town: South Beach Man Whore just started blogging about his sex life in HoBe, which I sorely needed to live vicariously, since HoBe Boobette, one of my dearest hos, found true love and moved to Hollywood, California. Move over, Adam Carolla: I see White Dade and Man Whore hosting the HoBe Man Show!

WHAT TO DO WHEN ACCOSTED BY A MONSTER

zOMG, would this be Manola's kid or what? Such chutzpah at a tender age!



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10 comments:

Anonymous said...

You had 100,000 page views in an afternoon?

Dyckerson, this blog as your girl alias does a lot more traffic than your regular one.

Anonymous said...

Cash, you figured me out! I've been channeling Manola since day 1!

Gabriel J. Lopez-Bernal said...

what a cute kid!

SuperBee said...

MAZEL TOV On the 100K! And that Cassie - I tells ya. Have you seen Pearl the Landlady yet?

I love cursing babies.

James Burnett said...

Congrats on hitting six figures. If each hit was a sperm then there are a lot of new Manola babies walking around out there.

Balou said...

(This is actually in reference to the "Jealous Bitch" post, but there's no comment link.)

Does it make you even more famous that your hate comment wasn't even on your blog? Seriously, if you can generate that kind of scorn on someone ELSE'S blog, you must be good! ;)

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, Ms. Blablablanik! I am so not worthy.

Maria de los Angeles said...

Thanks everyone!

Verticus, you so are ... look at the sidebar!

Balou, thanks for pointing that out! I don't know why comments get disabled sometimes ... I've fixed it.

Anonymous said...

oh!!! 100,000 page

Dan said...

Love it!